Follow my blog with Bloglovin I walked across the California-Tijuana border weeks after Donald Trump’s administration rescinded the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) program. I always thought my first trip to Mexico would be a… More
This is not a sponsored post.
I have never written a product review before. For the amount of beauty, fashion, and lifestyle products I purchase and consume, it is fairly odd that this is my first review.
It was only a few months ago when I realized Glossier was a cult beauty brand favourite. Having not-so-flawless skin, the “natural” makeup and skincare look associated with Glossier products never really appealed to me UNTIL… the Exfoliating Skin Perfector Solution was released. My face literally houses acne scars from over three years ago. So when I heard that Glossier created a $30.00 (so cheap) acne and scar exfoliator, I absolutely had to try it.
Being a slave to consumerism, I placed an order for not one, but four Glossier products. The Exfoliating Skin Perfector Solution, Cloud Paint in Dusk, Milky Jelly Cleanser, and Lip Gloss. Descriptions of the products will be kept to a minimal (you can read full descriptions on the Glossier website). Instead, I will include the initial reactions I had when trying my new products.
Efff-ya, I am such a sucker for cute packaging. Even before opening the box, Glossier won me over with that cheesy smiling face on the tape. Is it just me, or does that smile have four eyes? Damn, they are good.
No way! They gave me stickers. I adore stickers. Before I even opened my package, I was brainstorming where I wanted to put my stickers. On the walls, in my grade 1 sticker book, in my travel journal, on my dog…
This face wash feels like every other cleanser I have used, but at the same time completely different. This contradictory conclusion leaves me (and probably all of you) very confused. If I could describe the texture, it basically felt like I was rubbing a milk cleanser on my face. I guess that is why they call it the “milk jelly cleanser.” If there was a milk-type greater than 3%, this would be it. Unlike other cleansers I have used in the past, this one didn’t leave my face feeling stiff, tight and/or statue-like once I was done.
OW it f%&$#?@ burns. This solution feels like rubbing alcohol is burning through my face. I keep looking at myself in the mirror to see if my skin is still there. To give this product some credit, the website does state that it “sloughs dead cells away.” This is definitely accurate advertising. After one use my pimples are still prevalent – I wasn’t expecting them dissolve instantly though. My skin does feel refreshed!
This lipgloss encompasses everything an OG lipgloss does. That illuminating clear shine sparkles off my lips. As Snoop Dogg would say, it is sticky icky icky (even though he was talking about something else lol). I’m going through a Y2K lipgloss phase, so this gloss receives an A+++ from me.
The cloud paint is a lot more liquid-y than I expected. Maybe “gel cream” formula means something different to me than it does to Glossier. Personally, I anticipated a cream formula. Instead, this is very watery. The colour dusk blends in well with my olive-skin tone. If I had clear skin, I think this cloud paint would look a lot better on me.
My dog-son and I are pleased with our purchases.
Disclosure: I personally believe that mental health awareness should not be restricted to one day a year. I wrote this after finding out about recent suicides on my university campus. I thought today was an appropriate day to share.
Check out my acknowledgement of my own mental health here.
I always wanted to be strong.
Imagine, 5’2″ me, the strongest woman in the world. I could build bridges, end wars, encourage world peace. I can bring diverse populations together. No more hunger; no more pain.
I can do this all because I am strong. My physical body would pave the way for the toughest journeys I would face. My fierce mentality would push me towards my goals. I would never give up.
I am strong.
But, this is all a fantasy.
When I experience my darkest episodes of depression and anxiety, I feel so weak. Like my physical body is burning away into a pile of ashes that will be blown into disappearance. Everyone will forget me. My soul feels unworthy. It feels like the runt of the litter. The worthless one.
How can someone so weak ever dream about being so strong?
And that is what mental illnesses can do to you. After hearing about a recent suicide at my university, I let out a huge sigh. Another individual, like me, suffering from a mental illness was taken way too soon.
Whenever I hear about suicides I shiver at the reality of it. That COULD have been me. I am beyond happy right now. Haven’t experienced an episode of depression or anxiety in months. But, I have been there. And for all I know, I might experience that again someday.
I am strong. Not because of my muscle mass or mental ability to retain information. I am strong because of the power I have to fight back against the darkness in my life. This is a strength that not everyone has. BUT, this is a strength that we all should be encouraging in one another.
A lot of my strength has been internally founded. I have discovered ways to overcome my episodes. Yes, I am strong. But, some of this strength was formulated through the positive energy around me.
A simple smile I received from a stranger; A “how are you text” from a friend I hadn’t spoken to in a while; A quick and quiet stroll in the park with a good friend.
These little events are what made me strong. On the exterior, I appear unbreakable. On the inside, my soul would weep in pain. This is a feeling I hope to never experience again, but this is a feeling I know so many individuals are familiar with.
Before you decide to bully someone (like seriously grow up if you still do this), purposely avoid eye contact with a stranger, or send any other form of negative vibes their way, please consider what these people might be going through.
Sometimes the people with the STRONGEST exteriors are in the deepest pain. Remember this.
The skies were not so blue the day I visited Malibu.
I giggle whenever I reminisce on my Malibu adventure. A newbie traveller, completely unaware that Malibu is its own city. Wait Malibu isn’t a beach along the LA coast? My mind was blown learning the ever so basic Greater Los Angeles area geography.
I was staying at a Santa Monica hotel and Malibu was a bucket-list destination for me. I assumed putting “Malibu” into my GPS would be a suffice method to get to the beach. I later found out there are multiple beaches in the city of Malibu. Yikes!
Pre-Malibu picture. I’m devouring a Nutella cannoli from Carlo’s bakery. Damn, that pastry was so freakin’ delicious.
After a 30 minute Uber ride (I literally thought Malibu was a 5 minute drive away), I found myself at the Malibu Pier. I wish I filmed my reaction. The whole pier, and I mean the WHOLE pier was filled with fog.
Thinking this smog would eventually clear out, I decided to fill my bikini body with some Mexican food – A new obsession I developed while in California. Finding the nearest restaurant – it was literally across the street – I ordered my favourite Mexican dish… Quesadillas!
Feeling stuffer than ever and not giving a damn, I was ready to hit a nearby beach for some sunlight, sand, and to consume those Malibu vibes. Having little knowledge about the Malibu beaches, I basically played
Russian roulette with a list of beaches. The winner, El Matador beach.
The fog did not clear up. In fact, I’m pretty sure it got worse. I knew I would despise myself if I didn’t at least glance at the beach. So, I gained the confidence (even with my super full stomach) to rip off my outfit and strut down the beach in my cheetah print bikini. Body positivity, no matter what shape, size, colour or ability is everything to me. I wanted to capture a few pictures of myself near the rock formations. They were absolutely breathtaking.
To reflect on my Malibu experience, yes the fog absolutely sucked. But, I wasn’t going to let something so insufficient to ruin my day. The skies weren’t blue, but the views were still as extraordinary as I anticipated. To be given the opportunity to travel to such a naturally beautiful destination was rewarding on its own. Fog, or no fog, I am grateful to have consumed such beauty in Malibu.
The death of a young person really puts life into perspective.
I’m sitting here in my living room with the lights turned off because I cannot afford to pay expensive hydro bills. The darkness that fills the room leaves me clenching my eyeballs trying to hold back tears. I saw a friend from high school in a casket just a few hours ago. Twenty-One years old, my age, already dead. As a child, I always believed young people were never supposed to die. I think a lot of people still live with that mentality.
We plan our lives and goals assuming we have more time. All my dreams will come true in the future. But what future do we have? As saddest as I sound, life can be snatched from you at any second. Have you lived your life to the fullest? I know I haven’t.
Even in death Simon had the most positive energy illuminating from his casket.
In his Final Testament (a document Simon wrote before he passed), he wrote that he created an immobilization of ideas and memories he wants to ripple forward after he dies. I want the same to be true for my life after I die.
Luckily (and unluckily depending on how you look at it) there is no “countdown clock” ticking away the time we have left on this Earth. I am a big believer that our body is a vessel that holds our soul for a given period of time. But, what I fear the most is being forgotten. I want to positively influence each person I meet while living on Earth. I want my eternal energy to live on in people once my body decomposes.
As I placed my trembling hand on the casket of a fellow friend, I promised him that his uplifting energy and illuminating presence will never die. I will live each one of my days the same way Simon had. I will be kind to every living being that I meet. In my darkest times, I will fight negativity, disease, and failure with a bright smile on my face.
The death of a young person really puts life into perspective. Live out your dreams, your passions, and aspirations while you are alive. Be kind, be positive, and be bright.
You have all heard fitness stories a million times before. Mine is no different.
This year, I began my fitness journey. My love for fitness took a while to form. I never needed to lose weight. My weight perfectly aligned with my very petite frame. But, I was physically and mentally unhealthy. For starters, I was ALWAYS sick. My immune system resembled that of an elderly person. To be honest, my grandmothers have better immune systems than I do.
I have been involved in physical activities before, so I understand the mental benefits (if done correctly) associated with working out. For someone who enters deep and dark slumps fairly often, fitness has provided me with an escape. It has helped me clear my mind at times when I have struggled to see light.
Going to the gym never actually appealed to me. For starters, I hate cardio. I tend to get bored of routine exercises. The only appeal cardio machines have is that they are simple to use. Where I walk into a gym, I have absolutely no idea where to start. How do I build muscle? How do I target specific areas (**cough cough those love handles)? So many questions and so few answers.
Moving to California is what changed my perspective on working out. The recreational centre at Sacramento State is incomparable to any other school gym I have been in. There is a rock climbing wall situated between two floors, hourly fitness classes, two tracks, a swimming pool, and every workout machine imaginable.
Now onto my journey…
A bit about my body:
- I’m 5’2″ and very petite (small bone structure)
- I have a VERY fast metabolism (for now). For most people, this is a blessing. For me, it’s a curse. Whenever I got sick, (which used to be fairly often) I would lose most of my weight. Half of the time, I looked like a 12-year-old boy.
A bit about my workout history:
- I only started regularly working out 4 months ago. In the past, I would go to the gym occasionally, but never enough to notice a difference in my health or body.
- Some sports and fitness classes I used to do: Tae-kwon-do (Have my black belt), kick-boxing, yoga, softball, dance (hip-hop & jazz).
It’s a progress:
- Give your body time to adapt and change. In the past, I would get discouraged by the lack of results I would see after intense workout sessions. Rapid change isn’t always suffice and/or healthy.
- ENJOY THE PROCESS. Watching my perseverance and self control the past few months has been rewarding in its own. Even though my body has been SLOWLY changing, the greatest accomplishment for me has been witnessing the progression of my mental and physical strength this past year.
Good luck on your 2018 fitness and wellness journeys!
Most people wait until the new year to set their resolutions. I want to end my 2017 on a positive note. 2017 started off unstable for me. Suffering from cattiness, bullying, anxiety, and depression the first few months, it appeared like this year was going to be quite the rollercoaster. In August, I moved to California. This was a decision that completely changed my life (for the better).
I am the type of person that dwells on the past. When something doesn’t go my way, I reflect and contemplate why that happened. When I fail to accomplish my already unattainable goals, I get saddened. My perspectives on goals have changed recently. Before I begin listing what I expect to accomplish in 2018, here were my senior year goals:
Get a 4.0 GPA both semesters of school Befriend all my professors – Ask for extra help and recommendation letters
- Earn $10,000 in profit through work, other freelancing opportunities, selling pre-loved things to new & welcoming homes, and blogging (a girl can still dream)
- Volunteer once a month. It doesn’t matter where, when, or what charity
- Buy a sewing machine then learn how to use it
As you can see, only 2/5 of my goals were achieved. And that’s okay! Earning $10,000 in a couple months without having a steady, full-time job is nearly impossible to do. Volunteering while travelling, in cities I’m visiting without proper transportation is difficult. And how did I expect to lug back a sewing machine from California to Toronto?
My senior year wasn’t a complete flop though. On top of befriending all my professors and getting a 4.0 GPA (So happy about this), I progressed in areas of my life I didn’t even realize needed attention.
My fitness journey & body appreciation
It took me 21 years to realize the importance of body acceptance and self-love. For once I am FULLY satisfied and appreciative of my petite, 5’2″ stature. Going to the gym regularly has made me realize that strength (both internal and external) is not defined by an individual’s frame. I feel stronger and healthier than ever before and no person, bigger or taller than me, will ever belittle my self-love again.
Now, onto my end of the year and new year goals
2018 All About Me
Sounds a little conceded, I know. But, the second half of 2017 was rewarding because I was centred on my self and my self worth. For once, I lived my life focusing merely on me. I want to continue this in 2018.
- That workout grind continues.
- Instead of achieving a specific body type, I workout to gain mental strength and stability. It helps me clear my mind. If I gain physical strength as well, that is a bonus!
- Work, Work, Work
- As you have probably assumed, California has drained my bank account (I have no regrets though). Since my course load next semester is extremely light, I plan to find a job, or two, or three.
- Take a trip
- A lot of my happiness this year stemmed from travelling. I made a whole blog section on it. I have the travel bug.
- Apply to Graduate School
- I’m taking a year off before I begin my masters. 2018 is the year to apply to my dream schools.
- Start a creative initiative
- Super general, but I want to keep this a secret. I already have an idea of what I would like to do. I think a leadership role producing some creative content will be rewarding for me.